Here it is all close up an pornographic:
Makes you all tingly just looking at it. I’ve found my knit groove again and am focusing on selfish knitting for ME! (Thank you lord it only took me three weeks.) I started the Gigi sweater from the Summer 2008 Knitty using some luxurious hand painted yarn I purchased some time ago at Knitch in Atlanta, which is where I went today with the beautiful and funny Jackie and Claudia. I met some loverly new knitting friends and I finished the ribbing for the back of my sweater! I really miss Atlanta sometimes, maybe I will move there again, who knows? But the traffic is a nightmare and I really have come to love Gainesvegas, the town is cool and I have many good friends here.
I’ve had a wonderful (and mostly drama-free) weekend, although it is very unfortunate that I must reiterate to all the haters out there to leave me and my life and my memories the hell alone. I don’t need or require any more dirt, my current life post-trauma is just not all that entertaining, so please, please, PLEASE just watch some soap net, ‘kay?
More good news, the “misery diet” would seem to be paying off. Unfortunately my boobs are shrinking (Shari says “firming” but whatever) but also shrinking, apparently, is the rest of me. My jeans are all too big already and I’ve had to cinch them up an extra notch on my belt. The gym is not only a life saver for how I’m feeling (particularly when I’m trying to sleep at night) but also with the nifty butt-firming, ab-toning side-effects. Which is all very good for the self esteem, that quite frankly was shot to hell, and whose wouldn’t be when their partner strays from their relationship? Through my unhealthy obsession to follow the fall-out, I came to the following conclusions that I thought I’d share with the blogiverse. (It is really very cleansing…)
Girlfriend simply isn’t terribly attractive. I suppose I could go into illustrated specifics (that are both petty and cruel) but why bother? She’s pretty -ish- but not really striking or memorable, mostly sort of just feh (for lack of a better word.) I guess it would be much harder for me if he had fallen, be it ever so briefly, for a woman that was actually devastatingly beautiful, but for just adequate I’m finding it rather easy to get past this issue. Even though it was still a blow to the ego it isn’t worth much more thought on the matter. In retrospect, I suppose now the biggest problem I am having is pinpointing the initial attraction at all. Not just because of the physical mediocrity, but because she just wasn’t all that interesting. The few conversations I had had with her I never really could find anything worth talking about and I had given it a real shot (because she was Mr. X’s friend so I tried for his sake-what a fool I was.) At first I thought back that maybe I had subconsciously “vibed” into the fact that she is sort of predatory (which I still don’t rule out) but she didn’t even “blip” on my radar as any sort of legitimate threat because she was so…dull? Maybe a tad boring? Not very bright for certain, again, feh . Her personality is lackluster and flat.
Easy. (She is most certainly that.) Men act foolish when around loose women.
Self esteem healing, objective number one almost complete. Have a lovely week, I’m so stressed at work I’ll barely have the time to think, much less blog, so see you later!
